Am I Allergic to My Job?

I've been pretty tired lately. Could it be the mild depression? Maybe? But I'm not really convinced because I seem to notice it the most when I am at work. On the weekends, I'm fine! But on the days I know I have to go to work, I literally drag in the morning. I suppose my diet could have something to do with it as well. Gosh, is it just me or does everything always seem to revolve around the diet. What you eat, what you don't eat. Grr.. Maybe the diet is making me depressed! Maybe I'll just be in this never ending vicious circle forever. It really feels like that sometimes. I seriously sit and wonder why I was chosen to be overweight. Will I have something great and positive to share with others. Will I one day realize my dream of being thin and fit? It surely doesn't feel like it right now.

My job isn't too terrible, but it's not what I would call my dream job or anything. I do it because I need the money. I can't quit to do something else because I'm overweight and we all know that it doesn't go well in an interview. Companies discriminate whether they admit it or not. So I'm stuck. When I think about a dream job... is there one? I don't know. I think I'd like to do something from home on a part time basis. Photography and making cards - stamping, that kind of thing comes to mind. I also thought maybe web design would be okay. I did start school for that at one time, but I had to quit for personal reasons. I was a bit disappointed about that. There's times too that I wish I would've continued with playing the clarinet beyond high school and maybe learned the saxophone. I could be a saxophone playing clown doing gigs at school parties now and then. Oh I don't know. I just feel like the job I have now - sitting in an office building in a 6 x 8 cube (not positive on dimensions)for 8 hours is choking the life out of me! I have no motivation most of time to move (exercise). Ugh..

The holidays are upon us and I'm doing okay with it. I of course miss the holiday parties that use to occur when my grandparents and my mom were alive. Its amazing how much impact a family tradition has. I miss them terribly. I am looking forward to some time off work and being able to spend it with my kids though. That will be fun.

I'm not sure when I'll be back on again so just in case.. I wish you all Happy Holidays, Merry Christmas, etc. Enjoy your time with your families and friends.

♥ Dottie