Week 7 Update

I weighed in on Tuesday and was down another 8.2 lbs. for the week. We had some warmer weather this past weekend and I spent a lot of time on Sunday raking leaves. I was so impressed with how well I did. I probably raked for 4 hours on and off. Last year at this time, I couldn't even rake a straight half hour or hour probably without having to sit down due to pain in the knees/feet. I could feel that I might have a loss this week, but I was absolutely bouncing off the walls when the scale showed me those numbers 360.2!! My total since the end of January is 34 lbs. If I go by what I weighed at my last physical in November, then I've lost a total of 40 lbs. I'm SOOO proud of myself. I never thought I had it in me to be so dedicated.

Something that I'm finding that I truly believe...there are three keys to being successful. 1) diet 2) exercise and 3) behavioral (mentally ready). I truly believe that if you aren't ready to deal with the demons causing the wounds resulting in depression, then there's the chance that it'll be difficult to stick with the diet and exercise part of it. At least, that's how it's been for me. Losing the weight I have so far, has made me sit and think... "why haven't I been able to do this before?" It seems so easy. Well... I was never quite strong enough to talk about or deal with the way my dad talked to me when I was a kid. I've always feared my dad, but at the same time, I took everything he said to me to heart (so to speak). He would call me porky. Every time I did something, he'd tell me to "stop acting like your mother and grow up." He'd tease me about being chunky. I didn't like it then of course, but as a young kid...what do you do? (my parents were divorced by the way). The verbal/emotional abuse I took as a kid caused me to have serious issues with self esteem. Over the years, it just escalated. I came to believe that I was not worth much. One of the exercises I had to do in one of the behavioral group sessions was to list 10 Things I Like About Me. I had to think about that. Here's what I put:

1. I'm kind and caring
2. Can be funny
3. I'm smart
4. I'm hard-working (at my job)
5. I'm pretty good at photography
6. I'm a pretty good mom.

That was it. I started to look at things differently and deal with the wounds caused by my dad. I had to find it in myself to forgive. I've left group crying a few times.

Another thing I've done is found things to do when I started to feel sad or down about something. That's where the photography came in. It's amazing the self satisfaction that can come with a beautiful picture of nature that you took.

I feel like I'm finally understanding the full me and that I'm worth every ounce of energy and work that I put into being fit.

I will succeed and hopefully be able to share that success with others. I'd love to think I could help someone else out along the way. I don't like the idea of anyone having to feel the pain of not only being overweight, but the emotional burdens that often accompany it. It really hurts.

Please know you are worth your efforts. You can do this! And so can I!

♥ Dottie